Ok, here's the deal: I have written all the verses for Erotica Botanica, but I have to make a decision - which version of one particular poem to use. So I thought it would be fun to ask you all your opinion.
This particular verse is referencing "buzz pollination" or "sonification." A year and a half ago I didn't even know what this was, had never heard of it.
Certain flowers, like the shooting star and
the tomato, potato, eggplant and other flowers with cone like centers are buzz pollinated. This is done by a bee at close proximity moving its flight muscles rapidly, causing the anthers and flower to vibrate and the pollen to be released. I assume the bee then gathers the sticky pollen from the air as it is released, but I don't know. About 5% of flowers are thought to be buzz pollinated!
So I have two verse versions. I like them each for different reasons. You can respond with just saying you prefer #1 or #2, but I would appreciate hearing your reason if you can take the time. Printing happens at the end of the week, so please respond!
#1
your dashing beat of wings
ruffles my flashing colors
sticky from what floats between
both you and I
dizzy
#2
your dashing beat of wings
ruffles my flashing colors
tipsy with what floats between
both you and I
dizzy
you can click on the word "comments" below this picture to reply, or reply to my email, whichever your preference!
catherine--tipsy definitely, #2, though sticky may be more apt, tipsy reads better to me. my (cheap) 2 cents.
ReplyDeleteI like sticky better because it is more descriptive and evocative of pollen, but I think tipsy sounds better when read aloud.
ReplyDeleteBut, adjusted for inflation, my opinion is now only worth 1.37 cents.
Thanks Carminette, all the responses have certainly been worth a lot to me and absolutely earning my interest!
ReplyDeleteTipsy seems more in sync with dizzy at the end, AND reads better, although I DO like the sticky stuff. ?tipsy AND sticky?- on paper or only in our minds?
ReplyDeleteHmm. I think I prefer sticky, as tipsy and dizzy seem a bit too synonym-y to me.
ReplyDeleteI like both versions but vote for #2 because tipsy and dizzy make sense together, and stickiness is catching and stabilizing rather than dizzying. But I know what you mean...
ReplyDeleteWhichever you choose, I can't wait to see Erotica Botanica!
I like "sticky" better...actually think, along with being more apt that it reads better. Seems like a faster word...like dashing and flashing while tipsy sounds sort of
ReplyDelete"relaxed"?
Well, the choice between sticky and tipsy is settled, but I don;t have time to post till this weekend, I don't think! It's a very surprising solution.
ReplyDelete